Rolex (Okay, not Rolex but it felt like it)

Righty tighty, lefty loosie.

Loosie? Loosey. Loosee? To make loose.

Note to self – when the guys at the trailer shop are doing your annual service, tell them NOT to use the hydraulic doobaflotchy thing when putting the tires back on. I look like an idiot jumping up and down on the lug wrench by the side of the road.

However, a flat tire on the way to Pine Top apparently brought fabulous karma for the weekend.

Dressage was bellisimo and we hung out in 1^st place until the last rider nudged me out by 0.9. Even if it was short lived my name was listed first on live scoring. It felt like going to the prom with the popular guy, or getting asked for ID on your 30^th birthday, or finding out that broken cookies really don’t have calories. It was . . . ahhhhhh.

Where’s the paparazzi? Where’s the Chariots of Fire music in the background? Where’s the celebratory grog? (oh, the grog is in the cooler. Never mind).

And just like that, it was over.

“Ma’am, you’ll have to step off to the side, you’re not in 1^st any more. Yes, that means now. No we’re not going to do a recount. Ma’am, you’re just embarrassing yourself, please.  Ma’am, LET GO of the podium! ”

Better to have loved and lost, blah blah blah.

Stadium was . . . interesting.

I think we go left here

 Cool morning + bucking horse + who’s steering this ship? = 2 rails.

But XC.  Holy mother of pearl, Batman, did I wake up at Rolex?  Your Honor, may I present Exhibit A:

As a matter of fact I would like a drink


And B:

Say what?



And C:

I think I'll take the escalator, but thanks anyway

But D?:

Before . . . 

After

Your Honor, the prosecution rests. 

We might have had a bit of swag walking back to stabling. It was Rolex, after all. And 4th place sure tasted like victory. 

Introducing Otie!

Life is full of oddities.

Like why we park in a driveway but drive on a parkway, or why we buy a pair of panties, or why we turn the radio volume down when we’re looking for an address.

And why we buy the horse that fell on us.

Don’t adjust the TV, you heard me correctly. I bought . . . the horse . . . that fell on me.

#1 – It was not his fault (as previously described)

#2 – It kind of bonds us together, doesn’t it?

#3 – Wait till you see the video

He was bred by my BO/BFF and her longtime dear BFF to be dear BFF’s next dressage horse. He was born, he grew, got backed (and very well, whoever did that) and then he was left to grow some more.

Through a very strange turn of events - a death, an executor of the estate, a girl in love (me), and lots of phone calls I bought this lovely animal. He does have a condition that may or not be an issue in the future, but it was a leap of faith I was willing to take.

He’s got about 3 months of formal education now and learning every day. Even though he’s 6, it’s like seeing the world through the eyes of a toddler every time I’m on him. “Mom! Mom! What’s that? Mom! What’re we doing now?” “Mom! I gotta PEE!!!”

Remember that kid in school that raised his hand all the time? You’d think “put your hand down, you don’t even know the answer”. But he just wanted to try.

Otie is that kid.

He’s 17 hands of try. 17 hands of “I have no idea how big I am”. 17 hands of “Sorry I lost my balance. Again”

17 hands of all mine.

I’m taking his education really slowly, letting him grow building blocks in his mind. To ruin this beautiful creature with a rush to centerline would be a travesty.

I don’t know how far we’ll go, but if we make it to the top I promise to take you all with me.

 (forgive the video job. It was my first attempt at iMovie)

Beat the Confidence Monster But Took a Stupid Pill

What was I thinking? Seriously.

What on God's Green Earth was going through my head when I set out on XC in the North Carolina heat slash humidity with bare hands? I've done plenty of stupid things in my life (trust me, plenty) but that ranks right on up there.  No gloves? Honestly, Jennifer (as my dearly departed mom used to say).

I started to realize I was an ignoramus in warm-up. By the time I reached the 3rd fence I was chasing greased piglets through my fingers, by the 5th fence they were buttered noodles. Coby is a very strong horse XC and I have to have a constant feel of the bit to come to an agreement, kind of like letting steam through a pressure cooker. Each time I chased the wet herrings in my hands he took off like a rocket.

But, as they say, it is what one does when things aren't going well that defines you; and if trying times build character then I built one hell of a lot of it on September 8, 2012. For example:

My dressage trainer says that the 20 meter circle benefits everyone, so I maybe did a few on course (just to make her proud. Ahem.). I did think about pulling up when I was struggling so much with the reins but the circles got him back (though only nearly after he locked onto this Intermediate table) and I'm just so damned stubborn. In hindsight should I have pulled up? Probably. But I lived with my decision and tried to make chicken salad out of chicken shit. Ended up with a heaping pile of time faults and a very questionable stop at the drop into the water.

Experience is what you get 10 minutes after you needed it.

However, redemption on day 2:

I took the liberty of calculating that every rider in my division could knock down every rail and I would still be dead last. Sigh. Worst part is we were in 2nd place after dressage. Life's lessons have to be swallowed with a large slice of humility pie.

Mmmm, delicious.

Battling the Confidence Monster

I loath him.

I despise him.

He’s an evil, sneaky, beady-eyed beast that lives in every nook and cranny of your mind.  He’s 50, 100 years old. He makes the villagers pick up pitchforks and torches and march the square stomping and yelling; “Burn him!” “Tear him from limb to limb!” “Run him to the woods!”

He’s patient. He’s persistent. He sits and waits for the perfect chance to rattle your brain with thoughts of fear and doubt. He listens for you to fall asleep the night before a show and then whispers boo in your ear. Not loud, not even loud enough for anyone else to hear, just barely loud enough to wake you up and question your sanity . . . again.

He hides behind the Swedish oxer and under the Trakhener. He lays flat in the bottom of the beginner novice ditch. In fact, legend says every time a rider stares into a ditch he grows another horn.  He lifts the Novice coop just a wee bit higher, and the Prelim drop just a tad steeper. No level or course is safe from this gremlin. He feeds off the self-doubt that comes after a fall or a refusal (but falls are his favorite).

This weekend I will battle that monster.

I will arm myself with the pure thoughts of success and completion, and put the memories of my fall behind me. I will defend against his attacks with confidence and zest and really, really, really good coaching. I will, perhaps, take a swill of grog on the battlefield. 

And when he calls, I will say “Sorry, I believe you have the wrong number”.

And that will make me smile.

All dressed up and no place to go.

Ups and Downs and a new logo

The Ups:

Longleaf Pines Horse Trials was such a blast. I'm very late posting about it, but . . . (insert lame excuse here). It was just my 2nd Prelim and it made me feel like Xena, Warrior Princess. Coby was, as usual, a XC machine. He is such a confidence builder. He gets so excited for the course that I almost can't get him in the start box for all of his frat-boy antics. The entire show went really well. We understand each other so much better now and we went around like champs. Just a couple seconds behind time to add 2.4 points to our dressage.

Sailing over the oxer

Corner? No problem.

The Downs:

It's been nearly 4 weeks since the crash. I was wondering why I was still having so much pain in my foot so I asked one of the podiatrists to take a peek at it under the mini c-arm machine at work. It turns out it is broken in 4 places instead of the originally thought 2. My 2nd, 3rd, and possibly 4th metatarsal heads are cracked like little dominos in a line. It doesn't really change anything, but it sure explains the pain. I was so looking forward to our run at Full Gallop a couple of weeks ago, now I have my sights set on the end of August for a trip to Aiken.

Life is full of surprises: the good ones, the bad ones, the ones that make you scratch your head and go "huh?" I have to admit I'm losing my sense of humor over this whole thing. That woman left the scene not knowing if I was dead or alive. That saddens me. In a time when movies about torture and glorified violence pass as entertainment, when parents are afraid to let their kids play at the park, when global warming is old news next to global bombing, and when "smart" cars would lose a fair fight to a tricycle, I cling to the one thing that should endure all: human kindness. Caring enough to help an old lady load her groceries, letting someone else take the last space in the elevator, giving an honest smile to someone that just needs to know they're not alone.

It's a dog eat dog world out there. Sometimes I feel like I'm wearing a Milk-Bone bra.

The Logo:

But enough postulating. May I now proudly present (bum-de-de-bum!) the new logo:

Don't you just love it!!!!!!

More soon.

House going up and Horse going down . . .

Q: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?
A: A guy that stays up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.



House going up:

It is really taking shape. Hard to believe we'll be moving in before the Summer is over, then the real work starts. Building a house is easy, building a home takes a little more work. If you ask me, its the work that makes it special.

The Hardyplank comes out of the box that color, it hasn't been painted yet.

Horse going down:

They'll give just about anybody a driver's license apparently. Last Monday I went for a hack on a big beautiful warmblood that's at the barn deciding what he wants to be when he grows up. Kris (barn owner and dear friend) came with me on her horse. In the short distance that we had to walk on the grass along the road some crazy woman driver came speeding up behind us in a very loud pickup truck.  Having someplace of utmost importance to be she did not find the need to slow down AT ALL. Horse spooked, horse fell, horse landed on Jen.

We unfortunately landed on the pavement. The sound of that helmet hitting the road was a sound I won't forget. My first thought was "Oh my God, I'm still alive", my second thought was "Oh my God, get this horse off of me".

Bought myself a ride on an ambulance and found out just how uncomfortable those backboards really are. But I came out pretty good: left foot broken in 2 places, poor little dislocated toe, and a hairline fracture of the left hip. Considering he landed right on me and rolled off the top, I think I did okay.

Take home message : ALWAYS WEAR A HELMET!!! I would have been roadkill had I not been wearing one. Well, roadkill or maybe a veggie-for-life eating strained prunes and wearing depends.

As I type this I should be in Aiken at the Full Gallop Horse Trials competing Coby on their amazing Prelim course. So disappointing. I forever cling to the thought that things happen for a reason. Maybe that woman learned a valuable lesson about road safety, and maybe that lesson will keep her from killing someone later on. Maybe I wasn't supposed to go to Aiken for some forever unknown reason. And maybe crap just happens. *shrug*.

Well, as they say in the big tent - just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming swimming.

House update #3

Gaaahhh! The completion date has gone from December, to November, to October and now to September. Apparently the weather is cooperating or Saturn and Jupiter are in alignment or whatever. All I know is that we haven't even started planning a move yet (the Fayetteville house isn't even on the market).  But like a tornado, it cometh whether we are ready or not.

September will be busy: moving, sending a child off to college (sniff, sniff), winning the lottery (it could happen) etc . . .

We must find Zen moments where we can.

The first of several paddocks.

And for your viewing pleasure:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3m0c-UjtUoY&context=C4ed6491ADvjVQa1PpcFOKxs2iNGPojzpMSeCDuBr2MgNY1cLEJ6I=